Moving to Bend: Reality Check #1

Moving to Bend: Reality Check #1

So, this arrived in my mailbox yesterday:

My “move to Bend” packet from Visit Bend.
Somewhat contrary to my original Bend Oregon Info page, here’s what I learned:
  • There are only 158 fully sunny days a year, on average, in Bend (with 105 additional “mostly sunny” days).
  • The gardening season is three months — basically June – August. Severe frost in May and September truncate the growing season a bit.
  • The chosen name for those who live in Bend appears to be “Bendites.” I prefer “Benders.” I may have to start a campaign.
  • Nighttime temps are in the 20s from November – April.
  • The City of Bend has a Facebook page, a Twitter account, and a YouTube channel (don’t miss the Sewer Advisory Group Tour video. Scintillating).
  • Real estate agents in Bend are on it. Rental agencies, not so much.
  • I can get $100 off bendbroadband installation through Vance Allen by using the code: VISIT. That’s the only special offer for new, um, “Benders” in the slim packet.
  • Visit Bend claims the city has “hip cosmopolitan appeal” (see page 1 of the Official Visitor Guide magazine). They also like the tagline “cosmo cool.” Really? I hope it’s all marketing nonsense. I’m leaving L.A. to get away from that sh*t.
  • Bend is not a collagen/juvaderm/botox-free environment. I didn’t really think it was, but I was sad to see this advertisement below, on page 36 of Visit Bend’s Official Vistor Guide.
An ad in Bend’s Official Visitor Guide —
Surgical and non-surgical facial enhancement so you can “finally look the way you feel.”
(I’m pretty sure people “enhance” their mugs to look way better than they feel.)
I made the move to Bend. I am not deterred. Bring on the cold. Bring on Dr. Villano. Bring on the cosmo cool (if it really exists), and let’s do this.

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